I Demand a Recount!
by LMN
Summary: Tee-hee. A Digimon spoof on the presidential election. ^^


Forward: This is the result of what a month of _nothing_ but the election can do to a person. Having to discuss the election for most of class, I got inspired and scribbled this down in school, then finished it up at home today. I'll get my other stuff out as soon as I can, but I have to much work to really come up with any good ideas for any of my other stories. Hope this will suffice until them. ^^ Note: I really haven't captured the personalities of the characters that well. I may delete this depending on what people think about it. Not to mention I was a little sugar crazed when I wrote this...

Disclaimer: Don't own Digimon or Election2000 parodies. Don't sue.

"I Demand a Recount!!"

by M

"And so, I would like to conclude by saying that I invented the Pineapple Mac and did not have any relations with Mimi, so with that put aside, it would be a great honor if you make me our student body's class president." Izzy concluded, bowing his head and walking back towards his desk.

"Why, thank you, Izzy...." Mr. Fujiyama said as the thirteen-year-old sat down at his seat, "Now that out two candidates Izzy Izumi and Ken Ichijouji have made their speeches, let's begin out voting. Matt?"

The blond nodded to his teacher and proceeded to place a square, white sheet of paper on top of each student's desk. This continued until he reached Tai's desk. The brown haired teen was drooling on his desk, having fallen asleep halfway through the speeches.

Matt gave his friend a hard knock on the shoulder, causing him to jerk up in his seat as if electrocuted. By this time, Matt had already made his escape, and was now in the back of the room giving ballots to the next row of students. All that was left for the baffled Tai to find was a white sheet of paper with the two candidates names on it, and a small square under each name.

Remembering that the school election was that day, Tai decided that this was the ballot. He held up his hand, and brought his pencil down upon the ballot menacingly.

"One vote for Izzy, one vote for Ken, one vote for Izzy, one vote for..." Mr. Fujiyama droned on, counting each vote and sticking them in two separate piles on his desk.

Yolei, president of the unofficial "We Love Ken " Club, sighed. Ken was winning. Already the eleven-year-old's pile had a slight advantage over Izzy's. 

Her mind began to drift off into another world, the classroom turning into a cloudy dreamscape. She watched each ballot the teacher counted. Ken's, Izzy's, Ken's......

Mr. Fujiyama, now accustomed to alternating between Ken and Izzy, instinctively placed the next ballot into Izzy's pile. However, it was a vote for Ken, and while he didn't notice it, a certain young girl sitting in front of the class did.

"STOP!!!" Yolei demanded in a loud, controlling voice. She stepped up onto her desk, causing the student around her to jump out of the way, mildly freaked out, "That's not right! That vote should go to Ken!!! Look at it, you da*n, biased teacher!!! I demand we have a machine count in this election!! I can see clearly that hand counting these votes is going to lead to an unfair result in this election!!"

Mr. Fujiyama held his hands up in front of him, "I'm sorry, Yolei. But we don't have machine counting in this school. We can't afford it." he explained.

She huffed, "That's why _Ken_ should be president!" she snapped, "He cares about education. He'll give us what we deserve!"

"O-kay......" her teacher trailed off, "Well, if you don't trust me, you can always watch me count the votes. It would be nice to know that I'm not making any mistakes."

Yolei smiled, thinking of the advantages she could have, being so close to the piles, "Ok." she agreed, smiling slyly.

She walked up to the desk, ready to do what ever she could to 'help' make sure that the right candidate won.

Izzy, however, didn't let this go unnoticed.

"Mr. Fujiyama." he stated, standing up, "I have to say that I trust you considerably as well, as the good people here who voted in this election. However, I don't trust Yolei to be entirely fair to the misplaced votes of _my_ supporters. I want to request that someone of my choice also observe the ballot counting as well as Yolei."

'Oh boy....' Mr. Fujiyama thought, 'Since when was politics this competitive?'

"Fine." he agreed, "Who?"

Izzy thought over his choices carefully. Who was most loyal to him? He said the first person the came to mind.

"Cody." The redhead answered.

The younger boy looked up, hearing his name called. Looking at Izzy's nod of approval, he stood up and walked up next to Yolei to observe the counting.

And so the counting continued......

Izzy thought over his chances, Ken and he were very close, this election could come out either way. He needed a back up plan. He caught sight of Tai, who had once again fallen asleep out of boredom atop his desk. An idea 'clicked'.

At first it was a distant tap, but it soon became an annoying poke. Tai slowly opened eyes to see a piece of paper being shoved, not so genteelly, under his arm. 

"Wha?" he asked, taking the paper and opening it up, confused as to who wanted to pass him a letter.

Inside it read:

Dear Tai:

If, by any chance, I do not win this election, I need you to come up with a way to change the results. I know you can do it, Tai! Well, I know that you'll do something and if fortune smiles down on me, it'll work, anyway.

-Izzy

P.S. I'll even pay you!

'He'll pay me?' Tai thought. That sounded cool. Now all he had to do was come up with a plan...

"Hey, doesn't that vote look like it's for Ken?" Yolei asked, pointing to a ballot that appeared to have a check in each box.

"No way!" Cody exclaimed, "It's marked more in the other box. It should go to Izzy!"

"Ken!"

"Izzy!"

"Ken!"

"Izzy!"

"Guys, just make up your minds! Jeez, I think I'd rather do Biology." someone shouted from the class.

"Bring up a third party!"

"Hm.....Hm......" Sora said, turning the ballot back and forth. "Oh! Right here!" she said after five minutes of observing the ballot from all angles, "Look! There's is the slightest eraser mark in the corner of Ken's box. This vote goes to Izzy."

Yolei fumed, "I don't see it! Your being biased, Sora Takenouchi!"

Sora shook her head and pulled out a microscope from one of the classroom's cabinets. She set it for 100X and shoved the ballot underneath the lens. 

"Look right there." she said, indicating that Yolei should take a peek into the microscope.

"Well.." Yolei said, trying to come up with an excuse, "You were handling it too much!! That smudge could be from you turning back and forth as such. Or maybe when you stuck under the lens. There's no proof. I demand we have a further investigation!"

Everyone in the class sighed. In the back, Matt sank lower into his desk. he had only meant for it to be a practical joke.

After three periods of wasted time, the votes had finally all be counted.

Ken fans gave a cheer as the younger candidate was announced the winner.

Izzy sulked, then glanced at Tai, showing a wad of five's in his pocket to the fourteen-year-old.

Tai nodded and stood up, "Stop!" he shouted causing the cheering, half for Ken and half over the fact that the election was over, "I demand a recount!"

"For what reason?" Ken asked, stepping up to the older boy.

"The um....the ballot was too confusing!" Tai shot out.

The class stared at him for a moment, "Tai," they said, "All you had to do was check the box under the candidate's name that you wanted to vote for.

"Well, that's it then! My vote went towards the wrong person! I thought you had to mark the box of the person who you didn't want to win! Besides, I thought there were chads, so I'm pretty sure that when I tried to punch a hole in my ballot, the chad fell out incorrectly!!!" he declared.

"Oh, I guess this was your ballot them." Mr. Fujiyama said, holding up a ballot that now resembled Swiss Cheese more then paper.

"Yeah!" Tai said, attracting a few strange stares.

"Can it, Tai!" Yolei yelled, "Just because your an idiot doesn't mean you can take a vote away from Ken.

He stepped up to meet her, "Well, I have rights! And I say that there should be a recount!"

Out of the corner of her eye, Yolei noticed a folded piece of paper on Tai's desk, "A-ha!" she exclaimed, "Not only are you trying to change your vote, but your keeping others votes as well!" 

She grabbed for the paper, not knowing that it was, in fact, the bribe note Izzy had given Tai earlier that day. She unfolded it and read the message it had scribbled on it. Her eyes widened, realizing what this was.

"Everyone!" she declared, "I have news Tai Kamiya is being brib-"

She was cut off as Tai shoved into her, in an attempt to keep her from blabbing. It worked. Unfortunately, he shoved a little too hard and Yolei feel to the ground, hitting her head, and drifting into unconsciousness.

"Oops....."

Tai request, however, was carried out. The votes were recounted, and many changed. Some in favor of Ken, but more in favor of Izzy. It ended with the recount declaring Izzy the winner of the election, instead of Ken as stated earlier.

Izzy beamed and Ken glowered. He had lost by only one vote. The loser sulked over to Yolie's desk and sat down. It may have been a strike of good luck for Ken, and a curse for everyone else, that he happened to walk up to his number one fan's desk, for on it was an empty ballot, left unchecked and not handed in by it's owner due to her excitement over the election. Well, he would use this to his advantage.

"Wait!" he called, once again disrupting the cheers over the end of the class election, "I now demand a recount. We have to fill out the absentee ballots!!"

"But Ken," Mr. Fujiyama said, checking the attendance sheet, "Everyone was here today."

"Unfortunately." someone grumbled.

"Yes, but on Yolei's desk I found her ballot. She forgot to fill it out. We all know she should vote for me, but since someone knocked her out, we have to assume that it's my vote and so Izzy and I are tied."

"No way, Ken!" Izzy shouted, "To vote for someone else, no matter how much you may believe he or she will vote for you, is unconstitutional! We shouldn't count her vote."

Ken stood up, "Every student in this class has an equal right to vote for who it is they want to lead them. It their right and we don't have the authority to take it away from them."

"Well, that may be true, but we can't wait all day, and Yolei seems to be out like a light at the moment. I say her vote shouldn't be counted." Izzy said.

"It's a vote that could, and will, tie us up!" Ken shouted, "You don't have a right to take that vote from her."

"You don't have a right to vote for her!"

Davis stepped in between the two feuding boy, "Ken, Izzy, knock it off! Arguing won't get us anywhere! I say, if you can't take care of this, we'll take it to the student council!"

The class let out a collective groan.

Izzy and Ken stepped awkwardly into the dimly lit room. The student council was said to be made up of the students who were best at solving problems and dealing with issues. Any thing else about them was shrouded in mystery. the room itself was barren, save for a long table in the back. The table had three chairs behind it, and in those chairs were the three members of the student council, Joe, June and Wallace, their faces covered in shadow.

"So," Joe said (think the Godfather), "You want us to settle your argument, eh?"

Ken nodded, "Yes."

"Very well," June said, "Explain your problem."

The two candidates quickly explained their debate over whether or not the absentee ballot should be counted in their class election.

Once both sides were finished giving their argument, Wallace stood up, "Very well, leave us. You will have your answer momentarily."

The two nodded and scampered out of the room, "The doors closing ominously behind them, as if driven by some unknown, supernatural force.

"Well, now we'll just sit and wait."

Nearly another hour droned by. Ken paced in front of the door, while Izzy felt content just sitting and staring at the entrance to the student council's chamber. Off to the side, some girls played cat's cradle, and a few boys tossed a hacky sac around in an open area of the hallway.

Finally, the doors creaked open, sending the class into an eerie silence. Slowly, a sealed envelope emerged from the crack in the door. It was dropped to the ground, then the door once again closed.

Izzy and Ken stared at the document for a moment, before making a mad dash for it at the same time and ripping it open.

Inside it read:

After discussing your dilemma, we have voted 2 to1 in favor of Izzy Izumi. The absentee ballot shall not be counted. 

Izzy smiled and Ken fumed. Any respect or fear he had for the council had completely for the moment dissolved.

"This is an outrage!!" he screamed, "I want an appeal!!! I'm taking this to the principle!!" he shouted, storming off towards the main office.

Mr. Fujiyama sighed and followed after his student. Next year, it would be a random drawing, that was for sure....

Ken stormed into the principle's office, "Principle Johnson!!" he yelled.

The principle, a fat, round faced, cheery man, came out of his office holding his ears, "Yes, young man?" he asked, seeing Ken standing in the waiting room, red in the face from all of his shouting. Behind him, stood what Johnson thought must have been the entire student body.

"What?" he asked.

Once again, the debate over Yolei's vote was explained in detail. The principle just sat there in thought, listening to a summary of the antics that had led them up to their current position.

Principle Johnson just stood their, chin resting in his hand for a moment. Finally he got up from the chair on which he had been sitting. 

"I have come to my decision." he stated. 

Everyone looked up at him, eager to hear the final ruling.

Johnson turned to Tai, "What's your name, son?" he asked, kindly.

"Um...Tai Kamiya, sir." Tai answered, wondering what he had to do with anything.

"Well, congratulations, Tai." Johnson said, holding out his hand, "I don't think that either of these two are capable of being a good president, so I appoint the position to you."

"M-Me?" Tai stammered, taking the principle's hand and shaking it.

"What?!" Ken and Izzy demanded, "You have no right!"

"I'm the principle." Johnson said, "I have all the right."

"That's not true!" Izzy countered, "You need the consent of the student body to make such a decision." he stated.

Now Matt stepped forward to speak, "I think I speak for al of us when I say that we have had it up to here with this election. First of all, it's 4:30. I should be home by now. Secondly, you have both been acting like a cross between a obsessed freak and a baby for the past eight hours. I swear, who would want you to be president? If the president wants approval for his decision, he's got it from us."

The two candidates watched as the whole student body nodded it's head in agreement.

"Oh boy....."

"Thank the gods that's over." Sora said, packing up her books.

"Yeah, it was getting slightly out of hand." Cody said.

"No, Cody." Kari said, "Out of hand was a few hours ago. Right, T.K.?"

T.K. nodded, "You got that right."

"Well," Izzy said, stepping up to Tai, "congratulations on your achievement."

"Yes, I guess our actions were a little juvenile." Ken agreed, shaking Tai's hand.

"Let's here it for Tai!" someone cheered.

"Hip hip!"

"Hooray!"

"Hip hip!"

"Hooray!"

"Hip hi-"

"Stop!!" Yolei demanded, stepping into the room. The twelve-year-old girl was now wearing a cotton bandage around her head, but the angry expression she had had on her face earlier was still there, "I demand a recount!"

End :b


End file.
